"This is what the Lord says:
'Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom,
Let not the strong man boast of his strength,
Let not the rich man boast of his riches,
but let him who boasts boast about this:
that he understands and knows me,
that I am the Lord who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight'
declares the Lord. "
Jeremiah 9:23 -24
Lately I have had some issues with my blog and the purpose for it. Originally, I claimed that it was to get acquainted with the blogging world so as to introduce my sister and her home business. What I didn't claim was that around that same time my grief counselor suggested that I start journaling to relieve the myriad of emotions pinned up inside my head and heart. This posed a bit of a challenge for me. I have never been a big journaler and knew that I would fail myself again if I resorted to pencil and a bound stack of blank paper.
In comes the blog. I had always found blogs somewhat baffling. Why would you want to display your life, your thoughts, even you out there in the never, neverland of the internet? I mean, Facebook, that's fine. It's keeping up with people you know, right? But a blog? Why in the world would you do that?
Well, I found some people I actually knew who had blogs and I conceded. Their backgrounds were so cute and you can stay connected with people you know other than on Facebook. (Go figure, right?)
So, the blogging obsession began. First, it was a story about something little that happened. A funny story that would be worth remembering. And while I wanted to do what my counselor had suggested, I wasn't quite ready to open my heart and my it a true blog-ary. You know with that whole, "Dear Diary, today I...." feel. No, so I thought I would just blog about what I was doing around the house. That way there would be no negative for others' to bear. No, there was enough of that and I needed to know how to deal with those feelings on my own without involving others. That was the whole point of journaling - not pulling others down with my negative thoughts and to release some things that I wanted to tell those that I could no longer talk to.
Well, over the last few weeks, I have felt a nagging at my heart. We are not talking about a gentle pull on my heartstrings. This was more like an elephant swinging from the ropes of my heart making it extremely heavy. As I looked back over the things that I had been blogging about, that's just what they were things. Not many people, not many relationships, not much faith. Just things. It made me sick.
I had been boasting about the "rare and beautiful treasures" that filled our home. And though that they are, there is way more to it. I realized last night, after reading the verse above, that in boasting about those things, I was really wanting to boast about my parents, about how much I miss them, about how when I look at all of those things I see them. You see, those things are not just things to me, they are memories and stories trapped in physical vessels. Those things are not so important to me as what they represent.
My heart has been screaming to tell their story and to boast about how they instilled in me, my sister, my brothers a frugal mind. To boast about how they taught us that the stove is not just a place to cook, but that your children can remember it as the place where you met and kissed and the world stopped for a minute when you saw your spouse for the first time in eight hours. To boast about the white cabinet and how it belonged to my mom's grandmother who took her to church and taught her about God. To boast about how they taught us that the table is not just a piece of furniture, but a place for the family to gather and share time together. To boast about Daddy and how he tried to rise above his early life circumstances and persevered to make a better life for us. To boast about how they taught us that food is not just food, but a blessing from God that should be savored and appreciated.
You see, I don't really want to boast about things, but I want to boast about what those things represent. Love. Good Stewardship. Gratefulness. Of those I am "proud to be in the possession of."
Isn't it wonderful how God provides what we need when we need it? From the food we put in our mouths, to the money in our pockets, to the verses of His word that we read?
last definition taken from dictionary.com